Reclaiming Loki's Love
by jessica-bones-winchester
Summary: SEQUEL to Loki's Love. Please be aware of the rating change. While the other stories are T, this one is M.


The moment Fandral came to me that day, I knew. He had the same look on his face as the last time he delivered the message of Loki's death to me. Only this time he was more hesitant. He knew the strength of my love for Loki now, and he had watched me mourn before.

Thor had returned to Asgard with the news: Loki had died in his arms.

"Thor says that Loki earned the redemption he sought," Fandral said. He held me in a tight embrace as I cried. "He saved Jane's life," he said, "and Thor's." He pulled me away from him to look into my face. "Thor also said Loki's last thought was of you."

"I don't need his false comfort," I said. "How could he know that?"

"As Loki lay dying, Thor promised to tell Odin of the good he had done. Loki said that he didn't do it for Odin. Thor overheard Loki when he told you that he would redeem himself for you."

Fresh tears stung my eyes.

"Leave me... please."

I pulled myself away from my brother and walked to the balcony of my room.

"You should not be alone. Last time..."

"Last time, I thought he hated me. Last time... I didn't have him when I lost him. This time I know I had his love. He knew he had mine."

I touched my lips as I remembered our kiss. That somehow gave me strength, despite the gut-wrenching pain I felt.

"Why did you think he hated you?"

I froze. No one knew that I was aware of Loki's original plan to bring in the Frost Giants on Thor's coronation day. I had kept his secret, and revealing that I had known, after everything that happened since, would have gotten me in more trouble than I was prepared to handle.

"Before Thor's coronation, Loki told me he loved me. I hesitated, and he thought I had rejected him. I tried to talk to him, but he kept me away. I didn't see him again in private until he was imprisoned here after his attack on Midgard. It was then that I was finally able to tell him how much I love him, and he admitted he still loved me."

"I still don't understand how you can love him after that," Fandral said.

"Something tells me there are things we don't know. Circumstances we aren't aware of. Things we'll never know, now," I said as I hung my head. "Please, Fandral... I'd like to be alone."

He nodded, but came and wrapped his arms around me.

"I love you. I hate to see in you pain."

"I know. I love you, too."

A few days passed before I decided to do something to try to enjoy myself. I knew I couldn't stay in mourning forever. I grabbed my book and walked out to the garden. Along the way, I passed a guard who smiled at me. There was something familiar about his face, but I had probably seen him before in passing. I saw him the next day as well, but out of the corner of my eye I would have sworn it was Loki. I walked over to the guard, trying to stare into his eyes, but he turned away.

"Excuse me... guard."

He stopped and slowly turned. Not Loki... and yet. I stared at his eyes.

"Loki?"

The guard quickly glanced around, then he lifted his finger to his lips. My eyes filled with tears that this could actually be Loki.

"We can't risk being seen," he said. "Leave your book in the garden. I will bring it back to you... an excuse to visit your chambers."

"Is it really you?"

The guard smiled. "The night of the ball, you told me that you enjoy the touch of my hand." Excitement overtook me, and I moved to hug him, but he stopped me. "I can't reveal myself yet. No one knows who I really am. Only you. Go on with your day, and I will come to you later."

"I don't know if I'll make it. I've missed you." I couldn't stand not touching him.

"I've missed you, too. Go on," he said.

I forced myself to turn toward the garden, but I didn't do any reading once I was there. My mind played out what would happen when Loki came to see me, and I cried. To know he was alive was the best feeling I'd had since he told me he still loved me. I wasn't there long before I left my book and raced back to my chambers. I watched from the balcony of my room, staring toward the courtyard where the guard would likely enter. I didn't have to wait long before I saw him. Once he was in the building, I went back into my room. I paced and played with my fingers waiting for the knock on my chamber door. When it finally came, I froze. I stared at the door, but didn't move until another knock came. I smoothed my hands down the front of my dress, and opened the door to find the guard standing there, as he promised.

"I found your book in the garden, Miss. I wanted to return it," he said.

"Thank you," I said. I stood aside and motioned to a small table. "You can put it there."

He gave a small bow and entered, and I closed the door behind him. He removed his helmet, and the guard faded into Loki. The tears sprang to my eyes again. I ran to him, and he didn't stop me this time from hugging him. I held on to him like a drowning woman clings to a life preserver. He hugged me tight, causing my feet to lift off of the floor, and I sobbed into his neck.

"It's okay," he whispered.

"Thor said you died."

"I know. I'm sorry I put you through that."

"Why," I asked as I pulled away, and he placed me back on my feet, but we stayed in each others' arms.

"I didn't know what waited for me back here: freedom or the cell. I had to be sure that I stayed free... that I could be with you. I've looked over you since that day. It's hurt me to see you hurting. I should have known you would see through my illusion."

"You mean, you didn't reveal yourself to me?"

"No," he said with a smile. His thumb brushed over my cheek. "I wasn't ready. I'm still working on a plan. You saw me through the trickery... as you always have."

"Let's just leave Asgard," I said. "We'll go to another realm where we can get a new start."

"I'm afraid I need the security of Asgard for now, as well as the cover of death."

"Why? What's happened?"

Loki sighed and brushed his thumbs over my cheeks again.

"Can we just have this moment for ourselves," he asked.

"Loki-"

"I'll tell you everything later. Right now," he said as he pulled me close to him, "I just want to be with you... if you'll let me show you my love."

The gentle roll of his hips against mine told me his intentions. I took a deep breath. He mouthed at my neck with soft, slow kisses.

"I am yours, Loki," I whispered. "I have been for a long time now."

I ran my fingers through his hair, which was shorter than the last time I saw him. His lips found mine. The kiss was slow and sensual. So much more than our first kiss, which held so much fear and uncertainty behind it. This was just us, there in the moment, finally sharing our love. His hands slid from my face to my back, where he began to undo the long line of buttons down my dress.

I pulled my lips from his to take a breath.

"It's a pity you can't just snap your fingers and have my dress be gone," I said.

"Even if I could, I wouldn't," he whispered in my ear. "I want the pleasure of unwrapping you."

His fingers brushed over some of the newly exposed skin on my back, and I shivered.

"Nice to see I still have that effect on you," he whispered. I didn't need to see his face to know he was smiling. I could hear it in his voice.

He kept his fingers moving with just the lightest touch to my skin, ignoring the buttons for a moment.

"When I realized it was you in the courtyard," I said, "I wanted so badly to touch you."

"I know."

"To hold you."

"I know," he whispered.

His lips were on mine again, and his fingers resumed their work on my dress until all of the buttons were undone. He began peeling off the layers of his guard uniform. His lips only left mine when absolutely necessary.

I stood in awe of his slim, toned body as he stripped the last piece of clothing away. He let me stare for a moment before the back of his fingers brushed over my cheek, and my eyes fluttered shut. I felt his arms move around me, and he pulled the dress away. I expected to feel exposed when the dress pooled at my feet, but I kept my eyes locked on Loki's. He looked into my eyes as he caressed my face, then his gaze followed his hand as it trailed down my neck, over my shoulder, and down my side, just missing the side of my breast. His hand settled on my hip, and pulled me flush against his body. We both let out a moan at the contact, and each of us smiled at the other's reaction.

I put my hands on his hips, and kissed his chest. I heard him let out a breath, then felt his lips on the top of my head. He took a long, deep breath, and his hands roamed over my back as I placed random kisses across his chest. Then, he growled when I flicked my tongue over his nipple. He squeezed my rear and pulled me tighter against him before he scooped me up into his arms and carried me to the bed.

As he crawled up my body, my emotions got the better of me, and I had to close my eyes. Tears threatened to spill, and I didn't want to cry. Not in that moment. I was done crying. My Loki was alive and in my arms.

"Open your eyes, darling."

I felt his breath on my face as he spoke, and I willed my eyes open. He wiped a tear that strayed before our lips joined together again. One of his hands took mine and pressed it into the bed beneath as his kiss became more firm... more urgent. His other hand covered my breast, and I moaned into his mouth. The warm sensation that had begun in my chest, soon spread through my entire body when I felt Loki's knees gently push mine apart. With a firm thrust, his hardened length slid along my center. His lips left mine, and I heard his heavy, shuddering breath mingle with my whimper. We moaned as our bodies joined together, our faces buried in each other's necks. His lips found my earlobe as he began to thrust, and my entire body shivered. It felt as if every nerve was alive and Loki was touching every one of them.

Loki whispered my name.

"I often wondered what this would feel like," he said. His voice was deep and breathy as he continued to thrust. "You... beneath me... It's better than I ever imagined."

A loud moan escaped my lips, and Loki pulled back enough to look at me.

"Are you truly mine," he asked.

"Yes." My answer was barely a breath. "Always."

His thrusts came harder until a tremor ripped through me, pulling out a scream that he caught with a kiss. His body soon trembled along with mine, and he rolled us over, pulling me on top of him. My hair fell around us, and he pushed it back.

"You are so beautiful," he said.

I smiled, but couldn't help the blush that rose up into my cheeks, and I had to look away. Loki laughed.

"You blush? After what we just shared? During which you didn't blush once, I might add."

"Your affections have always made me blush."

"I noticed," he said with a smile.

"But tonight was different. That was more than your affection." I stared into his eyes for a moment. "You gave me all of yourself."

He moved us so that we lay on our sides as we faced each other. He took my hand in his and laced our fingers together like he used to.

"The night of Thor's celebration," he said, "I thought about asking you to be my bride."

I couldn't speak. My face must have shown my surprise.

"I know, it sounds mad. I hadn't even told you that I love you until that night, but," he paused and watched our hands as his fingers played with mine. Then, he looked back into my eyes. "What is the next logical step when you find that you're in love with your best friend?"

"You tell him," I said. "A step I failed to take."

"I didn't really give you the chance."

"I should have told you a hundred times before that night," I said.

"Why didn't you?"

"I didn't think you could love me the same way."

"That's absurd."

"Is it? The Prince of Asgard in love with a common woman?"

"You are far from common... and I would have been honored to take you as my Princess."

"Would have?"

"I somehow doubt that I still hold my title."

"Title or none, you will always be my Prince."

Loki smiled and gave me a gentle kiss, then lifted my hand to his lips.

"I don't know how I ever doubted your love," he said. "I saw it every day in your eyes. I felt it every time you shivered at my touch."

I wiggled my fingers between Loki's, and he loosened his grip so that I could pull my hand from his. I caressed his face, let my hand slide down his throat and chest, then buried my face in his neck.

"What do we do now?"

"Well," he said, "you could start a courtship with a very lucky palace guard."

"I don't want to pretend in public. I don't want to look into another man's eyes, or say another man's name. I want you, Loki. Or no one."

"I can't reveal myself yet."

"Why not?"

"The army that helped me invade Earth... they were under my command... but not my control."

I sat up and looked down at Loki. "What are you saying?"

"It's a long story, and I hope you trust me when I tell you that I am sparing you the details, but what happened in New York was not entirely my doing. And for my part in it, I was hoping to be caught. I was hoping that my brother and his friends would stop it all."

"I don't understand."

Loki sat up. "There was another behind it. He would have caused total destruction. I made him think I was on his side, but I was working against him once I was back under my own control."

"Under your own control?"

"Details, darling... I can't."

I saw a pain in his eyes. It was worse than the pain I saw the night he thought I rejected him. I wrapped my arms around his shoulders and held him close. His hand landed on the small of my back, and I heard him sigh.

"You would be free if Thor knew."

"I would be a target for a far worse villain than myself."

I pulled back and took his face in both of my hands. "You are not a villain."

"Don't kid yourself, darling," he said with a smile. "I know what I've done."

"But, Loki-"

He put his finger to my lips, then pulled me back into his arms as he lay down. I ran my fingers though his hair at his neck.

"I like the shorter hair," I said as we stared into each other's eyes.

He smiled. "I wanted to feel like my old self... even if it was something as superficial as hair."

"Did it help?"

"Not really." He brushed my hair away from my face, then ran his thumb over my lips. "You help."

I smiled and cast my eyes downward.

"I love making you blush," Loki said with a slight chuckle. He nuzzled into my neck and kissed down my throat as far as he could without releasing me from his arms.

"I have to go," he said. "I'm a guard now. They'll be looking for me."

"Can you come back to me tonight?"

"People may talk."

"I don't care," I said. "Let them talk. This new guard is my friend, and he's comforting me."

Loki smiled. "Is that our cover?"

"Yes."

"Wouldn't a courtship be easier?"

"I told you, I don't want to be affectionate with the mirage of another man. No one will expect that close affection from a friendship."

"We were pretty affectionate as friends," he said.

"Were we ever really just friends?"

"Maybe at the very beginning," he said, "but no, our affection stemmed from more than friendship."

"So, you'll come to me?"

"I will," he said as he brushed a finger over my cheek.


End file.
